Monday, December 6, 2010

One Year

Some say you are newlyweds up until a year. I am proud to say we are now old news. Just livin.'

We celebrated with dinner at GVG, where we ate a year ago, the day after our wedding day, with some family and friends.

2010, eating freezer burned, year-old cake. It tasted more of ritual, less of German chocolate.

Here we are a year ago:

2009, married for about 36 hours
Recap: There were only nine of us. Small ceremony, small gathering. Big party later. No honeymoon, but we're planning a vacation in April. This wasn't how I envisioned it when I started thinking about my wedding day about ten years ago. Strangely, I'm okay with all of this. As long as I've got him.
It's been an interesting year. Career changes, classes, unemployment, job searches, moving, working, changes in family dynamics, and reception planning, Initially, I was disappointed in the fact that certain close family members would not be able to see us get married. So we decided to do it when we were ready, and maybe, just maybe they could make it to our reception, as if things would be miraculously different in a year. As if we wouldn't feel a certain absence on our wedding day. Well, we realized that it was he and I marrying each other, making a new life together. We were so ready. We went for it. My parents were cool with that.

Certain things have not changed. Those family relationships are still estranged.  My dad was neither at  the wedding or the reception. All of the things I wanted to avoid, like the details of planning for our reception, came and messed with me anyway. Like money. Like time. Some that we thought were good friends really came to disappoint us.

But, the bond that  he and I have, has gotten stronger. We have tightened our little circle of trust with the people around us, made real and new unexpected friendships. We have vowed to never let anything or anyone hurt that sacred bond, and as husband and wife, learned to let go of whatever will not make us a stronger couple. Letting go is the biggest lesson I've learned this year.  The amount of support you give your spouse in a marriage is unfathomable. I'm learning that now. It's overwhelming, it's comfortable. Its an extreme blessing. It's freaking HUGE. I feel so grown-up. A little.

But here we are, life together feels so natural. So we've had to re-evaluate some relationships. But not ours. The one that counts.  We've got our rituals. Every day we lay down more bricks of what really matters on this path of ours.

Here's to living our vows every day.

He he, He wisked me away to the Doubletree after dinner. I call it unplanned, he calls it spontenainety.  It works. We both had to work the next day, so the hotel was like a minute away. Plus, we can't stand being away from our boy. On the first snow day  of the season:

I'll tell you about my "paper" gift to him this week.

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